Last review (Number 3) on Imogen's progress
Miss Thomas is losing the plot!
And finally…at last…after 6 long long weeks Imogen has finally got her self involved in the show. Tear down those curtains mommy and make me a dress, Imogen’s going to Hollywood!!…well actually it’s a lot closer to pinewood but you get the picture; Imogen has done something…could there actually be more to her than just pretty hair and a set of fancy teeth...
Well the jury is still out but by being first into the diary room this week she was given the role of saboteur for the weekly task. And despite not knowing what a saboteur was, I think in her Welsh village she’s the one who slaughters all the livestock, Imogen took to the task like Wayne Rooney let loose in an old people’s home (with relish)
An evil glint was seen in Imogen’s eyes as the housemates had to stop milk spurting from a huge vat of the stuff by plugging holes with their hands for 48hrs. It was a task that none of the housemates were particularly enamoured with, especially Lea who had come into the house to take a rest from being filmed covered in white stuff. If the level of milk in the vat dropped below the red line the task had been failed and it wasn’t long before Imogen with all the subtlety of Shebaz on a night out in Brighton, allowed the level of milk to fall below the red line. Job done, Imogen is up and running…
Elsewhere Pete’s top dog status is under threat, with female attention where ever he looks, its left him in a confused, befuddled and insecure state of mind and as a result were seeing more of a contrary rather Jim Carey, Pete. But a flash of the footlong and he’ll be back as the darling of the female and gay audience. Coming up on the rails though is Aislyene, she has become a real personality in the house and despite being put up for eviction this week, if the public decide to put her in the BB secret annexe she could well become the star. In the best words heard this week in the house she’s become ‘too real for the rest of the contestants’ to real!!! Maybe we should just call her A-lo... Jesus tonight…she’s about as Ghetto as Tim Westwood and his dad’s a vicar.
Glynn got just a little bit too excited by the prospect and I swear when he sat in the diary room , all DJ and dickie bow, I’m sure I could see a little bit of wee dribble out. He was giggling like a 12yr old school boy who had just reached the section on Africa in his geography text book…with the tribal women...with baskets on their heads…and errmmm floppy tits hanging out…..or was that just me. But I digress.
But we like her and the bit of spark that she has can only benefit by getting away from Lea and plastic lils. And boy does this Big Brother need a spark, hopefully the injection of five new housemates will provide it, bring it on……………
Until next week…
Week 5 Ratings
Aisleyne – On the rise, despite being nominated, Keeping it real and golden f’sure…and she looked alright at last weeks eviction but how pissed off would you be the next morning….go girl. 9/10
Glynn – C4 want him as favourite, and want to portray him as the gormless goofball. But as his confidence around his housemates and in him self grows so his public appeal wanes, I say make him grow his hair back and make him wear those red shorts again; a BB house is missing its goofball. 5/10
Pete – Quiet stuff again from Petey as he increasingly becomes the Finch to Lea’s stifler’s mom impression. Although he professes different I get the feeling he’s got a little something for Lea’s mother act, and it’s probably not all that small. Needs a good week, needs to get back his entertainer status to stay away from weirdo status. 5/10
Lea – 35 !!!! No fucking way, she looks a leathery old has been whose fanny flaps have the texture of sharks skin. She cried again as she missed her son..Well Lea, do us all favour and do one. Horrendous.0/10
Suzie the Floozy – Well she’s made it into the BB house after her husband, in true Verruca Salt style, bought over 4k’s worth of Kit Kats. She’s pretty, got big tits but looks oh so dull. I can’t see her causing conflict and I can’t see her getting it on with anyone…maybe she’ll give Glynn a lap dance. Don’t see her getting very far. We’ll see, if your that desperate to get in the house you must have something you wanna share…5/10
Big Dick – Victor mature has been quiet in the last few days, apart from his conversation with Suzie about top loading washing machines….lock up your sons this sexual terrorist is wild… 2/10
Lisa - Another non event of a week from the pie faced Manc. Her best bet is to go completely Kathy Bates on Pete. Remake Misery on poor old Pete, cut up his ties, put spaghetti in his pillow and then take a sledgehammer to his ankles. Just go completely nutbar on him. We could get BB’s first restraining order. Go Lisa, boil those bunnies. 3/10
Mikey - he is still a non event, model looks mannequin personality, plus I can’t actually understand a word he says.. his sentences just fall away into mumble town 1/10
Suzie – What a joke, apart from can I have a go on your boobs what else would you say to her…. Looked agitated as the girls chatted about what a sad state of affairs it is to be a kept woman like her…I just wish she’d been kept indoors around audition time. No good. 2/10
Nikki - Worries over her anorexia have surfaced this week, but she is still great value, and one of the few worth watching although she deserves to be in the final three she doesn’t yet have the popularity with her house mates to survive not being nominated…. 8/10
>Imogen – Her most productive week yet and sabotaging the task will score her massive brownie points, she needs to keep it up, she’s got the looks now its time for action if she’s to make the final 3. Oh to be have been a 720 pint vat of milk last week….. 10/10
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